Because of poor media representation and a lack of good conversation about autism until modern times, many parents of autistic kids find themselves having trouble. We want to reach out and understand while also trying hard to help them cope with the world around them, and it can be frustrating for parents and children alike. Here are some things all parents of autistic kids should remember and use at home.
Patience and Judgement Free Attitudes
Any parent will tell you that patience is essential, regardless of whether your child is autistic or not. Every day can't be perfect, and honestly, why would we want them to be? Kids with autism are fantastic and wonderful; children who need a little extra patience from their parents. It may feel tempting to get snappy or annoyed when you feel like your child is being difficult or isn't listening to you, but it's your job to help them. Tackle issues as a team, and show them that you're in on this together. If you punish them for behavior, they can't yet control. You're punishing them for just being themselves. Take the time to learn with them, and grow together, as well.
Don't Coddle Them; instead, Help Them Find Work Arounds
Some parents seem to be under the impression that if they don't do everything their autistic child asks or wants, they're bad parents. The thing is, your child will still have to learn, will even need to understand boundaries, and will always have to deal with discomfort. What you should be working on, instead, is helping them learn coping mechanisms that will allow them to self soothe and calm down from any environment or experience that would usually upset them.
Take your time to meet them where they're at, and help them recognize what's upsetting them. You can learn more about your child and figure out more healthy coping mechanisms if you look up autism services in your area.
Don't Overwhelm Them.
One of the worst things for a child with autism is sensory overload. This sensation comes when there's too much sensory input, and they don't know how to deal with this information. Observe for their cues that your child might be getting overwhelmed. This issue could be that they shut down a little, act erratically, or start being grumpy when asked too many questions or given too many options. Step back from what's happening and let them have their space. Not allowing them to decompress could push them into a meltdown, which will be exhausting for both of you.
Invest In Their Interests
This doesn't necessarily mean money, although buying more of whatever they love can be a nice gesture. Instead, invest your time and attention into whatever their interests are. Children with autism can have trouble reaching out, so you must reach out to them first and show them that you want to understand the things they care about. This might mean watching a couple of Doc McStuffins episodes on loop, or it could mean helping your child collect sea glass for their collection. Invest your energy into helping normalize their life, and letting them know you love them.
